Shadow represents the part of self that we ignore or reject; an aspect of our psyche that encompasses all of the traits, desires and impulses that we may reject or deny in ourselves, from negative emotions such as anger, envy or fear, and qualities that society may deem unacceptable, such as greed, arrogance or selfishness.
Shadow is an inherent part of human nature that is formed through a process of conditioning and socialisation. From an early age, we learn what behaviours and beliefs are acceptable through societal imprinting. Aspects that don’t belong are relegated, suppressed or disowned by us, and merged into the shadow. Ignoring the shadow can have detrimental effects to our mental and emotional well-being, as repressed emotions and desires can manifest as psychic disturbances or lead to negative behaviours later in life.
Owning your shadow is a crucial part of healing
When we awaken, we become aware that we may have blamed others for our shadow and pain projection. The shadow is often associated with negative traits but also contains positive aspects of ourselves we may not be fully embracing. For example, someone who identifies as kind and selfless may have a shadow aspect that harbours assertiveness and strong personal boundaries, which they can utilise to their advantage, once this aspect is uncovered.
The shadow represents a possibility for growth and wholeness if we can integrate those parts of ourselves that we reject. It is often linked to the concept of ego, the rational and conscious part of the psyche that creates a sense of self and identity. It is also attached to external things such as material possessions, status or power. Attachments can create a sense of separation from others, but healing the shadow provides an opportunity to dissolve these barriers and connect more deeply with our true nature.
Shadow work is the process of exploring and confronting hidden aspects that we suppress or reject. Facing our shadow can be a confronting process, but it’s a crucial step in our healing. Healing and integration of shadow require acknowledgment and acceptance, inner child work, addressing wounding, embodiment, nervous system recalibration and conscious and subconscious reprogramming.
Acknowledge and accept the existence of your shadow self by confronting aspects of yourself that you would rather not face.
Notice when you judge, blame or criticise another or reflect on yourself, ask ‘What aspects are at play do I need to own?’
Take an honest inventory of your thoughts, feelings and behaviours. Ask ‘What triggers my anger or anxiety?’ or ‘What am I scared of?’
When jealousy, anger or self-pity arises from your interactions, check-in and look at the underlying core beliefs operating.
As you dive deeper into this work, it’s important to practice self-compassion and judgment. This requires acknowledging emotions and experiences without placing blame on yourself or others.
Confront and work through your emotions. This can include facing fears or addressing past traumas. It’s helpful to express emotions through writing, journaling or creative activities.
Don't feed your wound. Every time you bring up issues that haven't been resolved, you keep yourself trapped within the wound, which transfers energy elsewhere or embeds it further. Feeding the wound is a looping behaviour from an unhealed, lower-frequency behaviour.
Feeling into the wound brings healing by merging an aspect of self through integration. Feel and process your emotional state. The mind wants you to stay stuck by entertaining old hurts, not healing them. Train yourself to stop talking about pain and focus on healing and clearing it instead.
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