Core wound is the deep emotional pain that resides within, often stemming from a traumatic or emotionally charged event experienced in our early years. This wound can often be subconscious and manifest in different ways throughout our lives.
The core wound is often regarded as a crucial element in healing and growth. It is referenced in Christian teachings as ‘the original sin’, a profound belief that psyche issues such as rejection, guilt, self-hatred etc, are passed down from generation to generation as our burden to carry.
The constraints become apparent in early childhood when we come up against invalidation or rejection in our relationships, which in turn impact our growth and authenticity. Over time, the core wound starts to deepen and attract experiences that validate it, creating lies in our heart that limit our experience and prevent us from tapping into our full potential.
The core wound is often described as a deeply rooted, emotional belief that can shape perceptions and interpretations of important events in our lives. For example, if someone experienced abandonment or rejection as a child, their core wound may run a belief they are unworthy of love, which plays out throughout their life until addressed.
Most of our quirks and shadow aspects stem from core wounding, so understanding, befriending and healing the core wound can allow us to break free of negative patterns and self-sabotaging behaviours that may hold us back.
All core wounding stems from a false belief. As children, we create stories to cope with difficult experiences and hold ourselves responsible to make sense of what happened. This can create a deeply embedded belief that plays out in various ways throughout life, creating issues in our relationships such as feelings of inadequacy or unworthiness.
The core wound is always seeking to be reaffirmed in the external until it’s healed
We experience the most suffering from our core wounding through the false self we present to the world. Identifying and healing the core wound can be complex and may require replaying and processing past traumatic experiences to develop new coping strategies. Shadow work can help uncover concealed aspects and give us the courage to face our wounds and any false perceptions of self.
Some core wounds are developed in the womb, or from a difficult birth, so we are not always aware of where they originated from.
Examples of core wounding:
Abandonment Wound is caused by being left alone or unsupported. It’s a very common wound that likely occurred in infancy. For example, a baby’s cries may have been unattended. Wounding can occur at any age but is particularly common during early childhood when we are closely attached to our parents. Children with an abandonment wound may struggle to form stable relationships in adulthood.
Betrayal Wounding is the result of being let down by someone we trusted. It can also be a betrayal of trust, loyalty or emotional support. This type of wounding can cause feelings of anger, sadness and disillusionment and can often lead to trust issues later in life.
Rejection Wounding is when we feel rejected or unwanted by others. It can be caused by rejection in relationships, work or social situations. This type of wounding can lead to low self-esteem and feelings of inadequacy in adulthood.
Shame Wounding is the result of deep-seated feelings of inadequacy and worthlessness, created by criticism or disapproval from others, or from feeling like you don’t measure up to the expectations of others. Shame wounding can lead to feelings of guilt, self-doubt and depression.
Trauma Wounding results from experiencing or witnessing a traumatic event or from abuse, violence, natural disasters or accidents. Trauma wounding can lead to PTSD and have a significant impact on an individual's mental and physical health.
Core wounding can manifest when we:
Enter relationships in the hopes of finding what we lack inside
Feel inadequate
Feel a sense of abandonment
Have a perfectionistic attitude
Suffer from chronic anxiety
Hope to be chosen
Repeat the same mistakes in relationships
Find happiness in our misery
Have unexplored shadow
Behave in dishonest or inauthentic ways
Feel emotionally numb inside
Own worst critic
Feel like an outcast
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